I have found that people make time for what it important to them.
In undertaking this journey I am realizing that life is made to be lived. This journey is opening my eyes to so many possibilities. Yes being fit is a challenge but what I think is really happening is I am developing a passion. A passion for life. A passion for me, where I am now, where I will be tomorrow and where I will be in five years.
This passion has been slow in developing but it is here right now. Over the last two months or so I have been really thinking. Thinking about my life. I have gone through a touch of depression. I have critiqued my self`worth. I have even hated myself for a moment. (Only a moment) Throughout it all, the love I have for myself has pulled me free. Free into a space where I have questioned how the heck did I get so far gone from letting my light shine.
Then the light bulb turned on. It darn near blinded me. Change can be made. What do I want? Why do I want it? How can I achieve it?
I want to be fit not SKINNY! I want to be healthy so I can enjoy all that life has to offer. I want to climb a mountain trail and not be concerned that my fat may kill me on the way back. I don't want to lose an opportunity to laugh because I am adjusting my girdle.
I want to learn swim so that when I am on vacation I can enjoy the warmth of the water.I also want to have another way to get some cardio done. The door to the treadmill has been closed to me but the window to the pool is WIDE OPEN! To help my joints because of the lack of arches in my feet I also need the pool. Who knew arches could throw your whole darn body off. Certainly not me!!
I have dedicated myself to my education, my family, my friends and my employment. In what was called a mid life crisis by a friend I got a tattoo that represents how I feel about myself deep down inside. "I am limitless. I shoot for the moon and the stars. " I am making the time to change my life. One day at a time. One choice at a time. Every goal I have achieved has been made with hard work and dedication. Tears, frustration, sheer grit and determination. My trips to the gym, the fresh food market and the grocery store are daily reminders of empowerment. My empowerment.
I am making the time to be great to me because no one can treat me better that me.
Water, check; gym, check; passionate, check!!
P.S. My chocolate cake with the chocolate frosting was delicious. I did exactly what I said. I had a slice with a glass of water. The next day I had a sliver. Not because I couldn't have a slice but I really didn't want more than a sliver.
I do not eat food that I don't like. It's not in my nature. The difference is I am going to choose how much to eat. I will not eat something to say oh I will work out an extra half an hour to work it off. What I will do is ask myself "is this worth it?", make a decision and then act accordingly.